The Wisteria Challenge

Yesterday I visited the City of London Dolls House Festival.  I’ve never been to a dolls house fair before and had no idea what to expect. Never in my life, have I seen quite so many people, peering quite so hard, at objects that are quite so small, yet perfectly formed! 

The standard of the exhibitor’s creations certainly put my own little efforts to shame.  I tried not to think about the decidedly wonky, glue and sawdust encrusted handiwork, squatting on our dining room table at home, as I skulked sheepishly around the fair, sure that they’d be able to spot the imposter who did not belong in their world.

But rather than tar and feather me with miniature handcrafted plumage, they seemed happy to let me browse. And so I managed to overcome my awe, long enough to make a few modest purchases, including some lovely handmade turquoise glass bottles and an oil lamp from Ray Storey Lighting who even kindly wired the lamp for me.

I have always dreamed of owning a wisteria and last year our neighbours presented us with one, so I’ve been looking for a tiny one, or a way of making one, to add to the mini house. 

I’m pleased to say the search is over. I found one at the Festival, in the form of a wonderful, if somewhat challenging, kit made by Georgina Steeds at The Miniature Garden Centre. 

In kit form ready to be transformed into a thing of beauty and a joy to behold forever.....

It comes with full instructions and four little bags containing all the miniscule parts required to create a very realistic plant.

Sadly for me, it is not supplied with little bags full of the expertise or patience I am going to need, to turn it into a Wisteria anywhere near as fabulous as the one they had on display.  Nor does it come with a spare pair of eyeballs for when mine become so crossed they need replacing.

But I’m up for the challenge.  I just hope I am up to the job.  I don't think I could cope with having my a*** whooped by a plant.

The finished product as made by Georgina Steeds at The Miniature Garden Centre.

Image copyright: The Miniature Garden Centre

I can only live in hope mine will look half as good as this once completed.

Image copyright: The Miniature Garden Centre

Having left Mr PJ waiting for me outside the Festival, afterwards we took a stroll along the Thames Path to the Captain Kidd in Wapping, where I showed him what I had bought.  Including a tiny wooden dolls house by Jacqueline Crosby Miniatures….

He rolled his eyes and asked if that meant I will now need a mini house, for the mini house’s mini house.  He has a point.

The Shrubbery

I'm not green fingered by nature and am really quite a danger to all plant life when attempting any form of gardening. So when I had the idea a while back, of "enhancing" the approach to our real house with some topiary, I thought I would play it safe, for the plants at least.

The not very impressive afterall "real" topiary...

Instead of buying the real thing and artistically clipping it into some whimsical shape for the amusement of all to see, I trotted to our local garden centre and purchased two, not very realistic, but user friendly, fake privet balls and popped them on top of a couple of zinc flower pots. Job done. I had myself a shrubbery! And no watering needed.

To make the same for the Mini House was not quite so simple. For a start, I didn't want to spend any money, and the only 1:12 topiary I had seen was made of resin, was very costly, and even less realistic than my plastic balls!

So, having found two smallish Christmas tree baubles and some hollow plastic pipe, I attempted to make something similar to the real(ish) thing on our doorstep.

I have "acquired" from my Father in law's paint stash, some amazing pewter spray paint, which I have already used on the roof and hearth in the Mini House. It has graphite in it, so once dry, you can buff it to a sheen with a soft cloth. It worked really well on the cut pipe to make the zinc flower pots. And to make them look water stained, I added a bit of watered down white acrylic dabbed on with my fingertip.

The shrubs themselves are made from the baubles covered in green acrylic paint mixed with sawdust and wood glue. Once dry, I coated them in another thick layer of wood glue, before rolling them in freeze dried mixed herbs from the kitchen cupboard, and more sawdust. Then a coat of matt acrylic varnish and a second layer of herbs, with an additional a sprinkling of moss picked from our neighbouring woods, which I dried and chopped into tiny fragments. Finally a few individual herb leaves were added with a spot more wood glue.

And these are the results. Not strictly in proportion but good enough I hope.

The mini version looking slightly less fake than the "real" thing

"Then, when you have found the shrubbery, you must place it here, beside this shrubbery, only slightly higher so you get a two-level effect with a little path running down the middle." Head Knight of Ni, Monty Python's Holy Grail